The Art of Self-Acceptance

Contributor: Amanda Hollyday

“New Year, New You!”  We hear the same message, year after year, and yet by January 3rd, it seems to be new year, same you.  How many times have you “resolved” to change how you live your life in January, only to get discouraged and slip back into the same patterns by February? My hand is raised here, and I’m sure I am not alone.  

When was the last time you looked in the mirror and winked at yourself or even simply admired your body?  If the thought of that makes you squeamish, you’re the majority.  While we are slowly warming up to the idea of body-positivity as a society, true self-acceptance is still a rather taboo notion.  It’s an idea that sounds great in conversation but is a completely different animal in practice.  As companies begin to amp up their marketing towards helping you become a better version of yourself in 2020 with “incredible deals” and “amazing results,” I can’t help but wonder when I decided I was “in need of fixing” in the first place.  It’s easy to get caught up in the genius marketing of the message we have been told our whole lives, “you need improvement”.  To be better, stronger, faster, thinner, taller, younger… the list goes on.

As a society we have been conditioned to focus on our shortcomings: where we need to improve and how we can be better.  While working towards personal growth is healthy, the constant feeling that you are “less-than” is not.  When we are invariably focused on our imperfections, we lose sight of what our personal strengths are, our natural talents, and how we shine.  Perhaps we are far better than what we give ourselves credit for.  Imagine that! You are what you think you are.  Let that sink in.  Your thoughts control how you feel and the actions you take as you move about your daily life.  You alone have the power to choose how you experience the present moment, simply by shifting your thoughts.  As we usher in the new year, I invite you to resolve to practice self-acceptance.  Let that be your personal mantra.  Acknowledge yourself exactly as you are and where you are.  Explore what it’s like to show up for yourself, knowing that what you are doing is good.  There is always potential for you to grow and improve, but that where you are currently is an important part of that process.  When you acknowledge the fact that you are deserving of care and compassion, you will experience a greater sense of peace and joy.  It starts with a shift in your thoughts.  Notice what happens when you change, “I can’t do XYZ… I must suck” to, “I am learning the steps necessary to do XYZ.” Notice what else shifts in your life as a result of your self-acceptance.  You will be more likely to make healthier choices that support your growth.